Post by kelley on Aug 22, 2010 0:25:08 GMT -5
we stop and grow and stop and grow
WE CO-EXIST, FLOURISH AND SUN KISSED
He had to love Dayna. She had to be the only reason that he was going to be spending the day with Charlotte. It had been too long; ever since he had told her he needed some time to figure out what he wanted, what he needed, he hadn’t seen her at all. They had talked a few times online and such, but really, it had been so long since they’d talked face to face. Really, they wouldn’t even be seeing each other if Dayna had not been a part of the equation. Dayna had insisted that the three of them had to spend the da together, as they hadn’t spent time together in such a long time. She had gotten used to not being able to see Charlotte everyday like she had, since Charlotte had lived with them. she didn’t, however, know the whole story behind it. How was he supposed toe xplain to a four year old girl that her mother came back into the picture after leaving him for four years, and he still had feelings for her? How would he explain that he left charlotte to figure out if he still had feelings for Kelsey? Really, here was no way to do that. Ha. The thought of explaining all that to a little four year old wasn’t a good one. So he told her that he and Charlotte just needed some time apart. That had seemed to work. She hadn’t asked too many questions; the only thing was that she was often trying to get the three of them to hang out together. It had been extremely awkward trying to explain to Kelsey that Dayna wanted the three of the to hang out. Really it had been awkward, but really what could he do? He couldn’t say no to her, and he couldn’t deny Charlotte the right to see Dayna. That was the last thing he would ever do.
When he’d woken up that morning, it had taken a good while for him to get up. He hadn’t been sure how the day would turn out. Whenever he was worrying about something, he’d spend whatever time he could in bed trying ot think of ways on how the day would turn out. It was kind of how he did things. The night after Kelsey had told him she was pregnant, he’d spent the whole next day in bed just thinking about what it would’ve bee like being a father, what the next nine months would have been like, all of that stuff. He’d done the same thing this m orning, only, you know, he hadn’t though tof all that stuff. He’d thought of Charlotte, when the last time they had hung out. In that time, they were together. God, this was going to be awkward, he knew it. He hadn’t legit talked to charlotte in the face, he was sure, ever since he had gotten back together with Kelsey. Was this going to be awkward? Ha. That was one of the stupidest questions he ever asked himself, and he knew it. He knew it was going to be awkward. How was he supposed to be able to look a ther? This wasn’t really how he had planned on being the day when dayna said they needed to hang out.
Course, there was no possible way to hide in bed all day. An hour after he had woken up, the little miss had come and gotten him, telling him that “mommy was coming up soon so they could hang out.” Her words exactly. The instant she had said mommy, he’d felt his heart drop slightly again. Ever since Charlotte had moved out, he always forgot how Dayna had always called Charlotte ‘mommy’ and whatnot. Every time she called charlotte ‘mommy’, there was that inevitable feeling of depression that ran through him. As he got dressed, as he gave Dayna breakfast, as he just wandered through the apartment until it was time to meet Charlotte at the mall, he had wondered a lot. How would Charlotte look? Probably the same; the same blue eyes, the same shiny brown hair, still five foot four or so, always inches smaller than him. The one thing that had gone through his mind though, was how she would look at him. That was what he was scared of. He didn’t want to see the anger, betrayal.. whatever she felt in her eyes. Sure, when Kelley had told her they needed time apart, that he needed to figure stuff out, she had been somewhat all right. Sure, it had been an awkward situation that had ended up with him sitting in his car staring out the windshield and almost driving into a pole or whatever it was, but there had to be more. She didn’t hate him, that much he was certain…As he drove and Dayna talked, talking about what she had seen on television and done in school the day previously (as he had worked late and she had been with his mother for the most part. She hadn’t had a chance to tell him about her day yesterday), the drive to the mall seemed to take no time at all, though he had wished that it had taken longer. He still needed to gather his thoughts. He still needed to figure out how he needed to act. He wondered how he would greet her. The obvious way he would have greeted her was out of the question now; hug, hand shake, a nod of the head? Maybe he’d better let Dayna do all the talking. She was definitely the more outspoken one out of the two of them, which they both were fine with. She loved talking.
Almost ten minutes after the car ride, Kelley found himself and Dayna sitting up in the food court, sitting at one of the tables closest to the escalators. Dayna had insisted so that they could easily see Charlotte when she came. Not in any position to argue, Kelley had merely gotten himself a coffee from Starbucks and had sat himself down at the table with Dayna across from him, glancing around curiously at all the people that were passing. Honestly, it never failed to amuse him how she always seemed to be so curious about everyone that walked past her whenever they went anywhere. It was as if she wasn’t used to seeing people, which was definitely the understatement of the year. He hadn’t really been paying much attention to anything, to be honest. He had found himself just staring at his Starbucks coffee cup, glancing up now and then to check to make sure Dayna hadn’t run off to some random stranger, or someone that they knew, even. Either way, she’d run off and try to make a new friend, or go talk to her friends. The girl really was a handful at times. Even if his attention was divided, he didn’t fail to notice Dayna getting up and running off almost a full five minutes later. He almost shouted out to her to come back when he glanced at the person that had gotten his daughter so freaking excited. Sure, he had gone through the multiple scenarios in his head on how he would react when he saw Charlotte, but really, the throat drying and the inability to really figure out how to greet her came suddenly. Clearing his throat, he glanced down at Dayna who was already trying to fight for her attention (not a hard task; it was impossible not to pay attention to her). Glancing back up at Charlotte, he forced himself to smile, somewhat, though it turned into some forced smirk, he figured. He wasn’t too sure. “Charlotte.” He said quietly, tossing the coffee cup into the nearest trash can. Shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans, he took a breath, looking her up an down. Yeah, the whole wanting to greet her like he normally would have thing was starting to try and make its way through.1342 WORDS - SAMMIE/CHARLOTTE C: - EH. I REALLY DUN LIKE IT :\